i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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