problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize