the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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