**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
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