I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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