We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
