I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
kristin has been a bad kristin
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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