I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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