Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Randomize
