what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Randomize
