she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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