as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
