I feel great
I just peed on a car
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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