I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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