My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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