some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
