im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Randomize