real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
50% drunk capacity currently
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
