Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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