then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
not ubering you a puppy
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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