I'm really into asian looking animals
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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