covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize