Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
This is my gift to your gina
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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