Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
