If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
PANTIES FOUND
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