You're so nebulous sometimes
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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