Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
People with herpes should wear stickers.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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