Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
