so that wasnt chicken after all
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
