Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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