i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
