So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
someone owes me an orgasm
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
