What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
