Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize