if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
You smell like a Billy Joel song
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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