actually, I'm a sock model
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
