we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
