Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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