I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
