They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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