Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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