if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize