everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
