bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
