Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
