Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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