i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
