Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?