okay pat passed out under dana's car
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
