im holly from the hills drunk
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Two words: nipple clamps
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